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Domestic violence and abuse

Domestic violence and abuse

Posted by sweetum on May 8, 2020 7:25 pm

Hello Everyone,

It has been a week since I have been diagnosed with breast cancer. My husband is very dominating and abusive in all ways.

He continues abusing me despite I have got cancer. I have a 5 year old. I think if I continue living with here, I will die sooner than I should.

I don't have any family or friends here. And I am also unemployed with no savings.

​​​​​​What do I do? I want to leave but I want to take my kid along. But how do I manage with a child after chemotherapy alone.

Thank you

Re: Domestic violence and abuse

Posted by Lacey_adminCCS on May 8, 2020 7:49 pm

Hi sweetum

Thank you for trusting us with this information. Your safety and your child's safety are important. 

I have sent you a private message to connect about finding support services that can help. Please check your messages. For example there are services that help with child care and domestic violence support. 

Do you have a close family member or friend who knows and can help? 

I will send you a brief welcome  message in case your emails are not private. Please reply when you can with your location so I can help find supports. 

I hope to connect soon. 
Lacey

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Re: Domestic violence and abuse

Posted by Lacey_adminCCS on May 8, 2020 8:13 pm

sweetum

Here are some resources for Ontario 

Domestic abuse support: https://211ontario.ca/211-topics/abuse-assault/?gclid=Cj0KCQjwhtT1BRCiARIsAGlY51J-s0gwSF3ua5O6gVT82MejJSeVYr9N_dhsYX1_yXGQOVCZ1ih87OIaAgzuEALw_wcB

There is an organization that helps provide childcare during chemo called nanny angel network :https://nannyangelnetwork.com/

Happy to chat more privately. 

Lacey

Re: Domestic violence and abuse

Posted by sweetum on May 8, 2020 11:58 pm

Thank you,Lacey. I will check it out.

Re: Domestic violence and abuse

Posted by SpeedyStill on May 9, 2020 3:22 am

sweetum‍ 
This is not the inviorment that is healthy for your 5 year old child or for you. Please stay in touch with Lacey to get the assistance you need.
This must be a difficult situation for you.
I  will pray that everyone gets the assistance and training necesarry to end violence and abuse completely.
Stay strong for your 5 year old and for yourself.
Speedystill 
 

Re: Domestic violence and abuse

Posted by Whitelilies on May 9, 2020 9:10 am

sweetum‍ hello
I simply send you LOVE.

Hugs from Lillian

Whitelilies

Re: Domestic violence and abuse

Posted by Kims1961 on May 9, 2020 12:38 pm

sweetum‍   Welcome and am so glad you posted.  I see that Lacey_adminCCS‍ has connected with you as well as some others from this awesome site.

I used to be on the board of directors for our local women's resource centre that helped women in abusive situations.  Thank you for trusting us with this very difficult information.  Please know, you are not alone and that you don't have to tolerate abuse. There are supports out there - that assist with helping you with your safety, your child's safety with you, how to get set up financially and even with your health care issues right now.  How proud of yourself you must be, to be able to look down the road and realize it's important to change things now before you get into treatment.

Most cancer centres also have social workers.  IF your husband doesn't attend your medical appts. , you may want to let your doctor/oncologist or nurse know what is going on as well.  They may be able to connect you with services. Many family health teams have social workers that can assist .  As well many communities have agencies that work in woman abuse - so they know how to help in your community.  The good news is that reaching out to them can be done safely and they will work with you - look at plans that you are feeling safe with.  

You are not alone, we are here, services are available.  Even without family or friends that can help - there is help.  Please keep us posted on how you're doing.

So glad you have connected with us!!  Kim
Her2+, ER+ Bilateral mastectomy in 2017, followed by chemo and radiation. Mack and Hannah's mom

Re: Domestic violence and abuse

Posted by sweetum on May 11, 2020 11:58 am

Hello, 

Thank you. I will try to get in touch with a social worker at the hospital. Thank you for everyone who replied. 

Hugs

Re: Domestic violence and abuse

Posted by Runner Girl on May 11, 2020 2:32 pm

sweetum‍ ,

I am so very sorry for all that you are going thru.  I do hope you are able to utilize some of the resources you've been given here.

I am responding to let you know you are not alone.  I spend 8 years in an abusive marriage.  If you need someone to talk to, let me know.

I wish you all the best.

Runner Girl
Never stop believing in HOPE because MIRACLES happen every day!

Re: Domestic violence and abuse

Posted by sweetum on May 11, 2020 3:01 pm

Thank you. I will send you a message soon...

Re: Domestic violence and abuse

Posted by sweetum on May 12, 2020 1:59 pm

If anyone here has been in a similar situation with battling cancer and domestic violence at home, please let me know how did they manage and what did they do. I want to know how they managed their treatment and took care of their child alone after leaving their partner.