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lung cancer what !! Longest week of our lives feeling numb:(

lung cancer what !! Longest week of our lives feeling numb:(

Posted by Callisto on Aug 20, 2018 12:53 am

My mom got a call from the doctors to come in on Monday and was instructed to make sure to have a family member with her ..... They found a 6 cm mass in her Lung doc said looks like lung cancer. she got blood work done Wednesday and they did a CT Scan On Thursday to see if it was wht they thought. Waiting all week has been really hard on everyone. Found out Friday it's not good, it's spread To the other lung and part of her liver and ribs etc, we will know the course of treatment when they see the specialist on Tuesday. In less than 2 years my dad had a heart attack I went septic then 2 months later went septic again then my dad gets skin cancer fights that and has his second heart attack and now this .... what's next !

Re: lung cancer what !! Longest week of our lives feeling numb:(

Posted by Brighty on Aug 20, 2018 9:08 am

Welcome Callisto‍.    You have come to the right place for support.   I'm sorry you are facing all of this.   The worst part is the waiting.    Once a treatment  plan is in place you start to feel a bit better  that a plan is in place to beat the beast.   I'd like to introduce  you to janinemont1970‍  who is fighting lung cancer as well as jorola‍ who was a caregiver  for her husband who had lung  cancer so you can get a feel for what to expect from both perspectives.    We have discussion  groups for both caregivers and cancer patients  alike on the site.  Just click on the 'discussions' button on the top.   In the meantime  how are you coping? Do you have a support  system to help you get through?   Make sure you have a good support  system in place that you can count on for what you need.   Whether it be making meals.. driving your mom to treatment. . Looking after kids if you have kids.. tell people  what you need.    Also make sure to care for yourself too while going through this.   Sleep eat and exercise.   You're no good to anyone  if you aren't well either.    Please let us know how things are going

Re: lung cancer what !! Longest week of our lives feeling numb:(

Posted by Momordica on Aug 20, 2018 9:13 am

Hello Callisto. I am so sorry about what you are going through. My wife was diagnosed with lung cancer in 2012. She had a lingering cough that doctors could not figure what was causing it. She was short of breath and had pain in her joints, which we had thought would be arthritis. My wife was called back to the doctor’s office but was not told to have someone with her. Then they told her the bad news. She was ALONE, which is definitely wrong when you are going to inform a person of a possible cancer situation. At one of her consultations at the walk in clinic, one doctor even said, “if you were my relative, I’d tell you to go back to work”, which was insensitive as he had not requested for any procedures. They were just suspecting asthma or was just making the story up just to get a medical certificate to be off work. Well, she underwent surgery, chemo, and radiation. The cancer came back again in 2014 and she was given a pill. That kept the cancer at bay for some time. And the. It made a showing again in 2016 with signs of it in both kungs and the brain. She was taken off her first pill and was given a study pill and this is again controlling her cancer. This year, she felt a pain in her arm and after a bone scan, they found a lesion in her left arm. She underwent radiation for the lesion supposedly would ease the pain. Welll she still has pain in her arm. We are scheduked for another CT scan end of thr month and consultation early September. Hopefully, everything is okay. Cancer is trully a battle with victories and setbacks. But the battle goes on. Right now, we just think positive, do not sweat the small stuff, have strong faith, and last of all, make memories. As a caregiver, it is alao difficult seeing someone you really care for in battle with cancer, but we have to face reality that it is there, the battle is real and we have to be there to support the ones we love.

Re: lung cancer what !! Longest week of our lives feeling numb:(

Posted by Callisto on Aug 20, 2018 1:26 pm

Thank you for welcoming me and the advice . We are lucky to have a close family with my 3 sisters and I just hits u hard you always no it’s out there but it’s never real until ur family gets it . I’m happy to hear u and your your wife are staying positive through something none deserves and I would've been so upset having to deal with a doctor like that. We're being as positive as we can, I've stepped up as the youngest of 3 sisters 32 no kids having hope no matter what cuz miracles happen every day and I've been researching every thing possible so when she finds out her treatments tomorrow we can get to the fight of our lives because that’s one thing we have is we are one stubborn family I’ll keep u updated when we hear tomorrow.

Re: lung cancer what !! Longest week of our lives feeling numb:(

Posted by jorola on Aug 20, 2018 2:51 pm

Hello Callisto‍ 
I am sorry for all that your family is going through right now. Did they do a biopsy on the mass in your mom's lung? I ask as this is the only way to confirm the presence of cancer cells - a scan cannot confirm if something is cancerous or not. I am going to assume they did.
Yes when all this happens it is a tornado of emotions, information, thoughts and things happening around you yet you are at the eye of it all where it is still dumbfounded and not knowing what to do, where to start, where to turn....anything. I am sure you have seen this all before with your dad and even your own illness.
It is so good you are all a close family. Teamwork is the way through this. Everyone does their part to help, to support and to carry the load. Still you all need to look out for one another. Give each other time away, get well needed breaks. This is needed to endure the journey and preserve one's well being.
This site has excellent information on lung cancer that will help your mom and your family understand what things she may expect. The important thing is that she always keeps her treatment team well informed of what's going on for her. I always recommend a note book for her to write down any questions she has so she has them ready for the dr when she sees them. It is helpful to have someone else there with her to write the dr's response for her so she can focus on what they are saying. As always - 2 sets of ears are always better than 1 too.
I hope you found this helpful. Please let us know if you have any questions and we will all do our best to try to answer them, Regardless we are here to support.
Take care and let s know how mom and you are doing.
Jodie

Re: lung cancer what !! Longest week of our lives feeling numb:(

Posted by Callisto on Aug 20, 2018 5:20 pm

First off I'm so sorry to hear about your wife. That being said your story gave me just the kick start I needed. My mom was almost the same as your wife with the asthma and Doctor not catching on , she's had asthma all her life but a few months ago when she had a cough she was told COPD but after antibiotics and a month or so she still had that cough. That's when they finally did an xray and found that mass. I don't know how you get told you have COPD without having an xray but that's what we do believe what the doctors say when we should be asking questions. Knowing now that her signs were so obvious and we just kept thinking her asthma or COPD ugh . Good luck at your next appointment I hope it's good news for you 2 strong fighters .

Re: lung cancer what !! Longest week of our lives feeling numb:(

Posted by Callisto on Aug 20, 2018 6:03 pm

Thank you so much brightly , just knowing there are other ppl that one can talk to is a relief . I have a very close family but we've never had to go through Something so hard . Waiting is so tough .

Re: lung cancer what !! Longest week of our lives feeling numb:(

Posted by Brighty on Aug 20, 2018 6:49 pm

Callisto‍ no problem. . Message  me any time.   I was a caregiver  to my fiance who had stage 4 esophageal cancer.    Ask me anything  you want.  I know how painful and guttwrenching it is.

Re: lung cancer what !! Longest week of our lives feeling numb:(

Posted by Callisto on Aug 20, 2018 7:48 pm

Hey brightly , well I do have 1 question on how can they say It's lung cancer without a biopsy ? Is it because the blood work and CT scan showed that the 6cm mass spread to the other lung and liver etc? What else would show that it spread other than cancer? Just confusing

Re: lung cancer what !! Longest week of our lives feeling numb:(

Posted by Brighty on Aug 20, 2018 8:14 pm

Callisto‍  I'm not 100 percent  sure . .. good question.   The CT scan can show a lot.. I know with my fiance  it was confirmed  by a biopsy. . So I'm not sure... anyone know???

Re: lung cancer what !! Longest week of our lives feeling numb:(

Posted by Lacey_adminCCS on Aug 21, 2018 11:50 am

Hi Callisto‍ 

I'm so sorry to hear about what your family is going through. I wanted to draw your attention to jorola‍'s post I have re-posted below. I think she answered your question.

Also here is a link to info about diagnosing lung cancer that I hope you find helpful. 

Please keep us posted,

Lacey




jorola:
Hello Callisto‍ 
I am sorry for all that your family is going through right now. Did they do a biopsy on the mass in your mom's lung? I ask as this is the only way to confirm the presence of cancer cells - a scan cannot confirm if something is cancerous or not. I am going to assume they did.
Yes when all this happens it is a tornado of emotions, information, thoughts and things happening around you yet you are at the eye of it all where it is still dumbfounded and not knowing what to do, where to start, where to turn....anything. I am sure you have seen this all before with your dad and even your own illness.
It is so good you are all a close family. Teamwork is the way through this. Everyone does their part to help, to support and to carry the load. Still you all need to look out for one another. Give each other time away, get well needed breaks. This is needed to endure the journey and preserve one's well being.
This site has excellent information on lung cancer that will help your mom and your family understand what things she may expect. The important thing is that she always keeps her treatment team well informed of what's going on for her. I always recommend a note book for her to write down any questions she has so she has them ready for the dr when she sees them. It is helpful to have someone else there with her to write the dr's response for her so she can focus on what they are saying. As always - 2 sets of ears are always better than 1 too.
I hope you found this helpful. Please let us know if you have any questions and we will all do our best to try to answer them, Regardless we are here to support.
Take care and let s know how mom and you are doing.
Jodie

 

Re: lung cancer what !! Longest week of our lives feeling numb:(

Posted by Callisto on Aug 21, 2018 11:05 pm

My dad text my 3 sisters and I that My mom was told today she has stage 4 lung cancer and is going to be scheduled for another biopsy as well as another ct scan, to see if it’s in the brain as well and once they have the results they will start either Chemo with some new kind of meds that they are very impressed with the results on other patients in the same boat she's in . We knew he was met saying all of it so My one sister called and was told by mom that She was told she has 2 months without treatment and up to 2 to 3 years with if it goes well

Re: lung cancer what !! Longest week of our lives feeling numb:(

Posted by Lacey_adminCCS on Aug 23, 2018 10:52 am

Callisto‍ 

I'm sorry to hear you got some tough news. How are you holding up?

Re: lung cancer what !! Longest week of our lives feeling numb:(

Posted by Callisto on Aug 28, 2018 4:59 pm

Sorry I haven’t been on for a few days. I’m not holding up to well....I’m living with my parents and am being the strong positive one trying to give hope but deep down I’m broken I go for drives and can’t control the tears I’ve only let my mom see me cry once and broke down just pissed off that lung cancer happened to her my mom , my world.  She’s haven a hard time eating and had a cough  that hurt her lungs ? I guess I just don’t know when to worry about just stressed or actual symptoms to think about  calling a doctor or taking her to the emergency while we wait a few weeks for her next biopsy and scans to decide what treatment is going to work. But with being told only 3 months tops to live  without treatment it’s almost a month in so scary the thought she could die in 2 months

Re: lung cancer what !! Longest week of our lives feeling numb:(

Posted by jorola on Aug 28, 2018 9:02 pm

Callisto‍ I am sorry the news is turning out this way. If they are scheduling her for more tests I am sure they will expedite them as fast as they can considering her status right now. If she has a good relationship with her family dr often they can find out how quickly the tests will be done.

Re: lung cancer what !! Longest week of our lives feeling numb:(

Posted by Lacey_adminCCS on Aug 29, 2018 4:42 pm

Callisto‍ 

I'm so sorry to hear what you and your family are going through. 

Trust your judgement if you think she needs medical care. Were you given a timeline regarding when you might hear back?

Keep us posted,
Lacey

Re: lung cancer what !! Longest week of our lives feeling numb:(

Posted by Callisto on Aug 29, 2018 5:19 pm

She doesn’t go for the bone scan till sept 13 and then biopsy and another CT on Friday the sept 14th then find out what chemo is gonna be best for her or wht treatment if any so we’re all at home waiting again .....
 

Re: lung cancer what !! Longest week of our lives feeling numb:(

Posted by Jimmi on Aug 29, 2018 7:09 pm

Callisto‍ Hello, I am a 66 yr old Mother of a 37 yr old Daughter and your words could have been written by her
following my diagnosis of ovarian cancer. I feel your sadness for your Mom.
If your Mom is having discomfort & pain I would suggest you take her to the Emergency. They could at least address & manage those issues and make her comfortable before she goes for further tests.
Jimmi

Re: lung cancer what !! Longest week of our lives feeling numb:(

Posted by Callisto on Aug 30, 2018 1:12 am

Thank you all for the support It’s such a scary thing but having this site make me a little less scared . I’m 
also so sorry that anyone has to go through this. I was wondering if anyone knows anything about wait times for tests like more bone scans, biopsies etc and also receiving your results and then how long to get started on treatment for someone considered Very urgent referral and told 2 to 3 months life expectancy without treatment ? 
Its going to be a month in by the time she goes for her next  tests:(:( my mom is so sad my dad barely holds his tears in and the waiting is the worst thing ever. Just figured I’d ask some ppl that have gone through it .....
is there even a chance she will get started on treatment b4 what they figure her life expectancy is ?

Re: lung cancer what !! Longest week of our lives feeling numb:(

Posted by jorola on Aug 30, 2018 6:17 pm

Callisto‍ usually results are back within a day or two regardless of urgency. I see from your profile you are in Alberta. I have even had my Dr call me later that same day of my bone scan regarding my results. Scheduling in for treatment again depends on where you live and the availability to fit her in. Both Edmonton and Calgary can usually fit someone in very quickly - like a week, maybe two. Both places have counseling available and I would suggest everyone take advantage of the services if they are willing. I am sorry everyone is struggling - not that anyone goes into this with a smile on their face. Just keep together and support one another as I am sure you are all already doing.

Re: lung cancer what !! Longest week of our lives feeling numb:(

Posted by Callisto on Oct 12, 2018 10:32 pm

Well it’s been awhile sense I was on last my mom just got all the results back yesterday and was told it’s in the brain as well and will start radiation within a cpl weeks and was also told 6 month statistics even with treatment were all so sick and sad is it possible to make it past that ??

Re: lung cancer what !! Longest week of our lives feeling numb:(

Posted by Brighty on Oct 12, 2018 11:47 pm

Callisto‍ I'm so very sorry.  My heart breaks for you!!!!      I say as long as there is life, there is hope!    Never give up hope!!!!   I have read some posts on here that are very hopeful even with the most grim news, somehow, they get their miracle, and I pray your mom will get one, too!

Re: lung cancer what !! Longest week of our lives feeling numb:(

Posted by Brighty on Oct 13, 2018 12:29 am

Callisto‍ I'm going to connect you with Lakegirl‍ .  Her post might inspire you.      

Re: lung cancer what !! Longest week of our lives feeling numb:(

Posted by Callisto on Oct 13, 2018 1:20 am

Thank you brightly it’s so sickening hearing that I believe in miracles and am trying to stay positive for my mom but it does hit you hard Sometimes the thought that maybe it is just 6 months and my mom is so young yet in her 50s doesn’t look sick at all just looks sad now that she heard all of this ...

Re: lung cancer what !! Longest week of our lives feeling numb:(

Posted by ashcon on Oct 17, 2018 4:48 pm

Hi Callisto‍ ;
I've been reading your posts and updates and am saddened to hear of what you and yours are going through. No doubt your days are filled with sadness, anger, and fear, amongst other things, but I do hope you are all able to find moments of joy where you can all still be yourselves, and not be defined by this disease.

Hope and perseverance plays a strong role in getting through all the ups and downs of a cancer diagnosis. Being open and honest about the impacts of cancer, especially advanced cancer, is also very empowering for all involved. 

My mother was diagnosed with Stage IV esophageal cancer in 2016 just 6 months before my own breast cancer diagnosis.  She was 88 years old when she was diagnosed. She was more heartbroken over my diagnosis than her own, and she was the ever strong one. She talked about her own passing, made all her final arrangements, stayed in her home until 3 days before actually passing - all while asking me about my chemo ("Did you lose ALL your hair - everywhere?") and saying to me "you are the one who will survive this disease."

I could not support her or be with her as much as I would have liked in her final days because I was undergoing treatments myself, but I learned alot about ways to help and offer support when we talked on the phone.  I found the following helpful - you may as well.
Advanced Cancer.  Check out the sub links on the left hand side.

You may also find this webcast helpful:  Advanced Cancer: Resources to help you plan and find support

Palliative care options should be something raised by your mother's doctors by now, and if not, should be raised by you. Palliative care has a terrible stigma around it, but it really is something that will help your mother as a whole person -as well as the family - in managing any pain and stress associated with the treatments she will receive, or any side effects.

Your mother is very fortunate to have you in her corner.  

What areas are they targeting for the radiation treatment?