Just a little funny comment for today.............it's a little strange but today I ran into a supply teacher at a school that I haven't seen in a while. We happened to be supplying at the same school today. She said I looked great and happy and perky and things must be going great in my life! Funny how we can put on a mask and a brave face so well that we fool people. Then she noticed my engagement ring and congratulated me. Asked about the wedding and stuff. So I told her the whole cancer thing. She said you would never know that happened because of the way I carry myself in public etc. Then I said she looked great too and she proceeded to tell me her brother passed away and she just got divorced etc. etc. I guess I'm just writing this because I often feel envious of people's seemingly "normal lives." But no one knows what anyone is really going through on the inside because people are so good at putting on a brave face to the public. I didn't know I was so good at it! No one would ever know deep down what people are really feeling inside. So I have to stop assuming that everyone has such a great life but me. Because if I can be so good at hiding my feelings, so can anyone. So I have to stop assuming the grass is greener for everyone else. I wish I could share my true feelings with my closest friends, but most of them have bailed on me this year. They are probably sick of the never ending cancer saga and don't want to hear any more of it. It's not like I sit and talk about it with them all the time, because I don't. But sometimes I bring it up if they ask how things are. I don't want to have to pretend things are great when it comes to my closest friends. But I guess I might start having to do that now too. I'm grateful to have this forum to express my real feelings. Thank you everyone!