How do u prepare for a Reoccurrence ?

@elle29 yes was told missed cancer in lymph nodes 1½ yrs later after original breast then again my bones 8yrs later so not easy but got to keep trying treatments!

try to be positive 💗

@elle29 Hello!

Do I understand you correctly that you have been declared NED but the doctor's advice is to prepare for a reccurence?

That is my case…all scans are clear after 2 years which is reason to be grateful. However, my oncologist says to ‘live my life without thinking of the cancer, but be emotionally prepared for a reccurence’…I also have a generic mutation, so added to the general statistics for my cancer type…there is an added ‘bonus’ probability of a different cancer.

I found that a very hard concept…so, I try to live without thinking of cancer (always) although it's hard to do, but then, the gift in that is to NOT PUT OFF THE FUN THINGS and don't put up with drama because time is precious!

I stopped thinking about how to be emotionally prepared for a recurrence because…how would I do that without constantly planning for it. I choose to think ‘Maybe ONE DAY, but NOT TODAY!’

Even in terms of financials…I prepare for the expectation that my money has to outlive me in a way that will support my two young boys, but I also have to prepare for the possibility that it will have to support me into my old age…I guess that's what every parent should do anyway. I probably just think more about it.

Sadie

elle29‍ , I’m not 100% sure, but I believe my mom did this - or at least, she was really good at planning things. She had her first brush with cancer at age 62, but by then, she had a lot of her life in order.

To me, being prepared is having your end-of-life wishes clearly documented. A lot of people do that when they first have children to ensure that there is a plan in place to care for the kids if anything happens to the parent(s). This also includes directions for care/ living will/ and nowadays can even include MAID, if that is something you wish to pursue if you ever find yourself in a terminally ill position. It’s best if all these documents be set up by a solicitor/ lawyer, just be sure they can be carried out if the time ever comes.

It’s also important to keep that documentation up-to-date, as well… I’ve probably updated my will 4 times in the last 20 years for various reasons - my executor passed away, I left a relationship, etc.

Sadie12‍ ‘s doctor’s advice of “live [your] life without thinking of the cancer, but be emotionally prepared for a recurrence” is a head scratcher, I agree. I was my Dad’s caregiver, and I knew his chance of recurrence was high (45%), and when I learned of his metastasis, I still was caught off-guard, so I can’t imagine how a patient can do that! Her advice regarding financial planning is good, too.

I say often that life is all about balance, and to me, this is even more true in your situation. It would be so great if we could say, “OK, today, I’m going to allow myself to think about how I want to live my life for 23 hours, and spend hour 24 thinking/ worrying about a recurrence, and I’m going to schedule that hour for 1-2 a.m. so I’ll be sleeping while I do it!” But, the process doesn’t work in such a straight line manner!

If I’ve misinterpreted your question, at least I’ve given you some ideas that are perhaps outside of what you were asking about.

#endoflifeplanning #finalwishes #Recurrence #planning #Balance