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Let's Discuss..fear of cancer recurrence

Re: Let's Discuss..fear of cancer recurrence

Posted by Haemish on Oct 12, 2020 12:18 pm

Whitelilies‍ Thanks Lillian.  Great thoughts and suggestions.  I see so much conflicting info about diet.  I see don’t eat nuts and seeds and others say to eat them as long as you chew them really well.   As far as the beast coming back, I have a phone call with my radiation oncologist this week for my six month follow up. I have a CT scan scheduled for November 9 then follow up
with oncologist a couple of weeks later.  I guess that’s when they will say I am cancer free.   I will ask some questions then to see what he says about reoccurrence.  

I guess I thought since my surgery was in May that I had mostly healed but the nurse pointed out the other day that it could take up to a year.   She had me sit up from a laying position and I could see a weird deformity in my abs and she pointed out that they haven’t healed yet.  Guess the timeline for this is longer than I thought.  Guess I will just keep walking and trying to have healthy habits and hopefully I will see the weight start to come off.  

Re: Let's Discuss..fear of cancer recurrence

Posted by MCoaster on Oct 19, 2020 2:44 pm

clairebb‍   I am so sorry that you have the  dreadful stress which you are so understandably experiencing.  Many here including me relate to suddenly being hit by a feeling of dreadful anxiety about a recurrence.  With me the anxiety takes over rational thought so it is hard to find a way forward.   I know that it is hard for family members to relate to how I am feeling and think they are reassuring by telling me I will be alright and I once asked my husband to “lend me the crystal ball” he used!   Have you spoken to your family about how you feel and how they can support you and you them?  I did this and started by saying how I needed them to hear me out about how I felt and what I needed them to do and then they had their turn with no interruptions.  Lots of Kleenex were used but at least everyone’s energy was more or less focused.  You might want to put your feelings in writing to them.   My son is twice your age and my daughter is three years younger and I still find comfort in telling myself everything will be okay so perhaps I need my own advice?

Is it an idea to keep a journal of your physical symptoms, with photos where possible?   You could then have a record to share with your team of cancer specialists so that they fully understand what is happening.   Perhaps it might also help you feel less anxious knowing that you have a record elsewhere and then enjoy your walks etc.   Exercise, having good nutrition and sleep are so important to everyone and also are necessary to recharge our batteries for what we have to face.  Easier said than done I know but worth a try.

 You might also contact the Cancer Society’s Information Line 1 888 939 3333 which is what I did when I was diagnosed with breast cancer.   I spoke with a caring, kind and knowledgeable woman who might not be able to cure me but who listened and gave me lots of information.   Perhaps your family might find it useful too?

Hugs and please, if you want to, keep in touch. 



Re: Let's Discuss..fear of cancer recurrence

Posted by clairebb on Oct 19, 2020 3:37 pm

MCoaster‍  Thank you so much for your response! I'm still trying to get used to navigating this site since I've only heard about this today. I've been wanting to know how other survivor's experiences were like and that I'm not the only one going through this feeling alone. As a student, I'm having difficulty adjusting back to my classes and feel like I can't do anything but reading through some of these posts made me tear up knowing that there are others who are also fighting their own battles and are still coping with the aftermath. I have been journaling everyday the past few months, noting new symptoms and my overall feelings and from what I can see, it's on and off. Some days I'd feel great and other days I can't bring myself out of bed. 

My family is very supportive (ever since I changed my diet and lifestyle, they did the same just so I don't feel alone) but emotionally, I find it difficult to open up because I feel like I'm burdening them with my own problems which is something I've always tried to avoid. I do try to comfort myself and keep my mind away from thinking about these worrisome thoughts but it doesn't usually work only until I see my oncologist. 

I will definitely try to reach out and thank you for the resources! Warm regards to you and your family :)