I can see where I went wrong when I look back on some of my posts. I had myself going in two different directions at the same time! If only I had kept myself going in one direction. I see why I was confusing people and myself. I wanted to go back to work, but at the same time I was considering retirement. I'm so upset with myself now. It's impossible to make decisions when you are feeling depressed. I had looked at retirement for so long, I didn't give myself a chance to even try to return to my job. I wish now I had.