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Feeling very overly sensitive over a loss of a cat

Feeling very overly sensitive over a loss of a cat

Posted by Rene on Dec 31, 2020 9:39 pm

Hello everyone,

It has been some time after my reconstruction in October, that I slowly recovered in 6 weeks and I sure did not feel like celebrating Christmas because of 2 things, the COVID-19 and knowing many people passed way from the virus. It was hard for me, I feel that lately I have been very emotional right up to finding out that my Mum dearest, her gorgeous orange tabby, Max who was put down because of his kidneys failing. It's the first time I feel SO heart broken and dread for my next Zometa Infusion treatment during this lockdown, or it's to be delayed?

I don't know how to get through this, I try to cherish the good times I had with him being a lap cat, his company & mischief when I am visiting over the last 11 years..

Anyone can drop hints and tips..

Thanks,
Rene

Re: Feeling very overly sensitive over a loss of a cat

Posted by Brighty on Jan 1, 2021 2:07 am

My heart breaks for you Rene‍ on losing beloved Max.     Only those who know what it's like to love a pet can understand the deep sorrow this loss can cause.     Pets give you unconditional love...they are there for you when you are vulnerable, and there's no deeper bond.    Some people  say this loss  can be worse than losing  a human.  I have a grey tabby named Vinnie who has been by  my side through  everything.   He is my best friend  in the whole world.   I love him more than life.     We also have a family dog named Brighty  who is my brother's.. but I consider  him my canine nephew.    He's been in the family  for 11 years and we adore him to pieces.      If anything  were to happen to either of them it would be beyond  devastating.     I can't imagine how awful it must be and im so sorry.     Do you know anyone  who has also lost a pet you can connect with ?    You can share the wonderful  memories  and stories of your fur babies.    Some people  cope with this type of loss by getting another pet.     Others may cope by volenteering in an animal  shelter  to be close to animals.     I found a website for you that might help.  www.rainbowbridge.com.   again , so sorry for your loss and bug hugs.   When is your next zometa infusion?  Wish you luck.  
Help is out there. All you have to do is reach out.

Re: Feeling very overly sensitive over a loss of a cat

Posted by happyhiker1 on Jan 1, 2021 12:04 pm

Rene‍ ,
I can so empathize, as just yesterday I had to take my dear 12-yr-old cat to 2 different Vets, to have tests and it appears he has major kidney problems (I can't bring myself to say possible kidney failure); I am waiting now for an update on his condiition.
Snowball has been beside me thru two major cancer episodes and I cannot bear to think I might lose him. 
So I wish you all the strength to get through your struggle with this loss. Our pets are so precious. I think we just have to remember that life for all of us living things is fragile.
Kind thoughts being sent from one catlover to another...

Re: Feeling very overly sensitive over a loss of a cat

Posted by Tjphee on Jan 2, 2021 9:25 am

Oh my goodness. Like any death there is no “right way” sometimes I feel we are already at the end of our rope and struggling then .... something else. Take time to grieve don’t put it off. Cry , scream, throw things do anything to get it out. After I lost a beloved cat I had trouble coming home to an empty house so in my case I went to a rescue organization and a cat picked me!  I didn’t replace I just continued to share my love!! 

Re: Feeling very overly sensitive over a loss of a cat

Posted by Essjay on Jan 2, 2021 1:52 pm

Rene‍ I don’t think you are being overly sensitive. You’ve lost a well loved member of your family. Of course you are grieving. Give yourself time, let it happen, but please don’t feel guilty xx
Triple Negative Breast Cancer survivor since July 2018

Re: Feeling very overly sensitive over a loss of a cat

Posted by Cynthia Mac on Jan 4, 2021 7:48 am

Rene‍ , one of the hardest things for me to deal with on my Dad’s cancer journey, was when his 20 year old cat got cancer just months after Dad did.

Within 6 months, my poor, dear old dad, lost his wife, was diagnosed with lung cancer, and had to have his cat put down. Both Dad and the cat had surgery for cancer just over a month apart. I was heartbroken for him, as you are for your Mom. 

Without a doubt, pets are part of the family, and when we lose them, we miss them and grieve for them. 

Tjphee‍ , less than a month after my little dog passed away, a stray cat started showing up outside my house. I ultimately took her in (after I learned she’d had kittens). I fostered the kittens out and adopted her. Through this, I learned about two foster organizations in my neighbourhood, and went on to foster two other cats until they were adopted. I found the fostering programs to be a “win-win” - I could help a cat, and help an owner find a cat, without the full commitment and vet bills. It isn’t for everyone - there’s a term, “foster fail” where people end up adopting a cat they’ve taken in to foster, but I was able to recognize that the adoptive home for these cats was the right thing for them.
“When the root is deep, there is no reason to fear the wind.” - Japanese saying

Re: Feeling very overly sensitive over a loss of a cat

Posted by Runner Girl on Jan 4, 2021 1:44 pm

Rene‍ ,

You are not being overly sensitive over the loss of your Mum's cat.  The unconditional love you received was a gift given by an angel in fur.

I've avoided this post until now as I am currently seeing the decline in my girl cat, Cali.  She's been on hyperthyroid meds for a while now and has recently started on Gabapentin for pain management.  She has good and bad days.  I know I am going to have to release her sooner than I wanted to and I'm struggling to face life without her.  She stayed by my side after my lumpectomy, slept with me during the worst of my chemo, she crawled into my heart when I first held her and hasn't left.  This will be a hard one to face.

She has a brother, Diego, who is well, albeit fat, whom I love to bits, but it's not the same.

I've had to release 6 of my own pets (not counting the pets from childhood) and they all broke my heart (2 dogs and 4 ferrets).  So this is not new to me.  I have also lost 2 siblings and both parents, so I'm no stranger to loss.  

Please allow yourself to grieve for the loss of this kitty.  You're not being silly and should not feel guilty.

Runner Girl
Never stop believing in HOPE because MIRACLES happen every day!

Re: Feeling very overly sensitive over a loss of a cat

Posted by elle29 on Jan 5, 2021 1:14 pm

Sorry for your loss of physical comfort of the cat of your mums . .
After losing 2 beloved pets in a year I searched and searched finding a breeder for my  my puppy dog .
But never replaced my cats , I so loved grieving and  
miss my momma Taby cat with black  boy cat I loved dearly .
Now I am  try to deal with a prognosis of another loss myself but with my 2 year Labraddoddle doggy leaning into me , filling that gap f 
But still would like a cat or 2 as pets for my LD and moi . Elle 29

Re: Feeling very overly sensitive over a loss of a cat

Posted by Butterflies on Jan 5, 2021 4:38 pm

Rene and for anyone who has lost a pet, my heart goes out to you. I feel your pain.

I will write about my situation at a later date because it's just too painful right now.

Re: Feeling very overly sensitive over a loss of a cat

Posted by Rene on Jan 8, 2021 8:23 pm

Thank you SO much everyone for your comments, I truly appreciate your kindness, sharing what you have experienced.

I was never this sensitive when it comes having learned a cat has been put down, until after my 3 year in treatment, surgery and radiation. When I visited, I think Max knew I was sick for some time. But up to last week Friday, hearing he was put down. I broke down, couldn't stop crying and that's when I knew my emotions were raw. Then I find out my Aunt passed away, but not from COVID-19, but health issues...

During my 1st chemo in late Nov 2017, I could not cry at all, all I knew was anger, but that changed about a year ago, now its raw emotion and tears, the anger is no longer on my plate of problems. Has anyone ever had this problem with emotions during chemo?

Rene