Forgive me as I haven’t posted anything recently regarding my life post cancer treatments. I finished my treatments in February of this year. So far, been doing really well, despite COVID-19 and all that comes with a pandemic. I went for my mammogram (6 months post treatments) and I found out that they want me to come in for more testing. This time for my right breast (left breast was the cancer breast last time). I feel like I’ve been sucker punched in the stomach. I’ve been doing so well! I was getting back to “my normal” as of late; walking 10 km/day, making sure I’m eating healthy and taking care of my mental and physical health. This felt like a giant step back. I know it’s just further testing (more imaging, an ultrasound and potential biopsy), but my brain went right back to where I was a year ago when I was diagnosed! I’ve been on Tamoxifen so I thought I was invincible. I figured the chemo, radiation, surgery and tamoxifen would all ensure I wouldn’t get cancer again until at least 5 years out; especially in the other breast! Now I’m questioning everything. I don’t feel invincible, I feel completely vulnerable. I’m trying to be smart about this. I don’t have any lumps so maybe it’s just pre-cancerous cells they’re worried about etc. My emotions and my mind are not connected and I’m literally having a battle in my body to stay calm. Trying to stay positive and keep positive. Will know more next week when I get more testing done. I honestly thought I was “cured”. This is a whole other learning curve, this “after cancer” stuff. Just didn’t think I’d be dealing with it again only 6 months post treatments.
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