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New here

New here

Posted by Melodelo on Oct 7, 2020 9:05 am

Hi to all of you. I dont even know where to start. I'm a 38yr old man with a beautiful wife and 3 amazing children. A few months ago I was diagnosed with clear cell carcinoma in my left kidney. I just had a Nephrectomy and am home resting. I also struggle with ptsd, chronic depression and anxiety which I have been receiving treatment for almost 10yrs. I dont know what's next and it scares me. 

Re: New here

Posted by Essjay on Oct 7, 2020 10:27 am

Hi Melodelo‍ welcome to the site no one wants to join. You are among friends here.

There is a Kidney cancer forum Where you will find discussion relevant to your diagnosis and meet others with similar cancers or those caring for patients with kidney cancers.

Having a cancer diagnosis when you suffer with anxiety sucks as I know well. For me it’s when I feel I’m not in control of things I get anxious, and there nothing quite like being in an unfamiliar system with unfamiliar tests and things going on to throw your mind into turmoil. I’m a planner and I’ve found planning things out has helped me through. Making plans for feeling awful during chemo for example - got the house cleaned, the garden sorted, groceries stocked and plans for click and collect so my partner didn’t have the stress of shopping etc. But I also found talking to the therapist at the cancer centre helpful. She helped me all through my treatment and still calls me every so often to see how I’m doing. She was an essential part of my team. Have you explored such resources at your cancer centre - it really helps that they know the treatments and from you are going through...

Otherwise, as someone who has come through cancer treatment I can share that what got me through was accepting this was happening to me, taking one day at a time, asking lots of questions to understand my treatment, and doing what I was told...

The things that really helped me were getting plenty of rest, getting outside every day, connecting with friends and family regularly, eating well...

How are you healing from the surgery? Do your kids know what’s going on?

best wishes Essjay
Triple Negative Breast Cancer survivor since July 2018

Re: New here

Posted by Lacey_Moderator on Oct 7, 2020 11:00 am

Welcome Melodelo‍ 

Love your profile pic. I'm so glad you took the time to introduce yourself. As Essjay said you are among friends here. This is a place to share, ask questions, vent, and connect. No judgement. 

Has your treatment changed at all since your cancer diagnosis? Do you talk to someone?


Re: New here

Posted by Melodelo on Oct 7, 2020 11:39 am

Yes my kids are aware. I am very honest with them. Thank you for welcoming me.  Surgery was ok. I'm still in a bit of pain but I'm only a couple weeks post surgery.  I am having alot of emotional episodes. I lost my mom in 05 to cancer so its playing hard on me. The doctor said he feels really good about the surgery. I go for renal scans tomorrow then dec 22nd I got for scans to see if anything shows up in my other kidney, lymphnodes and they are going to check my lungs. I'm scared. But I'm trying to be as positive as I can.

Re: New here

Posted by Lianne_Moderato on Oct 7, 2020 1:15 pm

Welcome Melodelo‍  I too love your profile pic!

Having lost a parent and then getting your own diagnosis can certainly play on your mind. I am speaking from my experience as I lost my dad to colon cancer 27 years ago and then received my own breast cancer diagnosis 10 years ago. What I do know is that cancer treatments and outcomes have come so far since then and our parent's outcomes does not need to to shadow our own. Sounds like your doctor is optimistic about your outcome so that is something to hang your hat on. Wish you well for your scan tomorrow. Let us know how you make out and reach out to this community at any time. There is a wealth of information here.