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New to this

New to this

Posted by Colin on Jan 2, 2018 4:32 pm

My name is Colin. I was diagnosed with Stomach Cancer, approximately one month ago. I don't have an appointment until January 10th. My condition is deteriorating rapidly. I have no intention of going through any life prolonging treatment. My question is, does anyone have any experience of a loved one or friend that has refused treatment and asked for medically assisted suicide?

Re: New to this

Posted by ACH2015 on Jan 2, 2018 9:21 pm

Hi Colin‍ 

​My name is Andy aka ACH2015. I am one of the Community Mentor's here.

​When I was diagnosed with cancer (June 2016), the first oncologist I saw said I had 3 to 6 months to live and no treatment was going to help me. So I fired him & got a 2nd opinion.

​I was extremely upset, and I spoke with my GP about medically assisted death, he said he does not participate, and he would have to find me a doctor that would provide that service. Apparently there are not many doctors that participate in assisted death. I never did push the issue. 

​You say you have an appointment coming up on Jan.10th. Is that for follow up after your initial diagnosis?

Have you spoken with any mental health professionals about what you are going through right now? I am glad you found this site - to ask questions and get information. I know how afraid and confused I was when I was faced with no hope during that first horrible consult. 

​Please seek out someone to talk to about this first. Social Workers at the hospital you are being treated at are an excellent resource. If that is what you mean by not having an appointment until January 10th, call the hospital and ask for an appointment asap - before Jan.10th.

​Do you have any family or friends you can confide in right now - if so reach out, and don't be alone with your thoughts. I am going to send you a private message with my phone number if you would like to talk right now. I am in Ontario as well. - its up to you Colin.

​Below is a link to information about Advanced Cancer from the Canadian Cancer Society. 


​I have also attached contact information for the Canadian Cancer Society information line. There are specialists that can help and provide any information you are seeking.

If you need support or have any questions, contact us.​Talk to us 1-888-939-3333

Cancer is a scary and very difficult thing to go through Colin. I am going through cancer a second time as I have just been diagnosed with a recurrence. The good news is I have good support, and a good medical team - that listen, and believe me - there are many treatments and alternatives available. I don't know how much information you have about your situation as of today.

​I am sending that private message to you with my number now - call if you like - OK?

​If you can't access the private message - re post & I will give you my number.

Here to help

ACH2015 - Andy.

Re: New to this

Posted by Lacey_adminCCS on Jan 3, 2018 11:22 am

Hi Colin,

I'm sorry to hear that your condition is deteriorating rapidly. Do you know what stage your cancer is? Will you have someone go with you on January 10? Treatment is such a personal choice and I hope you get all the information and support that you need to make the right choice for you.

I don't have any personal experience or stories to share. Below is some information from www.cancer.ca that I hope you find helpful.

"With recent changes to the Criminal Code, Canadians can ask for medical assistance in dying. You must meet certain conditions in order to be eligible for this assistance, and only certain people, such as physicians, are allowed to provide or help provide medical assistance to someone who wishes to die. People who help someone to die must follow rules set out in federal, provincial and territorial law.

The Government of Canada provides more information about medical assistance in dying."

Read more: http://www.cancer.ca/en/cancer-information/cancer-journey/advanced-cancer/medical-assistance-in-dying/?region=on#ixzz538gSwDud

You may also find it helpful to meet with the Social Worker at the hospital for some help processing your diagnosis and for assitance with information.

I wish you all the best. Can you update us after your meeting?

Take Care,


Re: New to this

Posted by Colin on Jan 3, 2018 11:31 am

Thank you Lacey. I've already read up on the criteria needed to pursue this. I do not know the stage yet, other than that it's a large tumour that has extended outside the stomach. I'll know more on January 10th. I will also speak to a Social worker at Credit Valley Hospital while I'm there. Thank you.

Re: New to this

Posted by Lacey_adminCCS on Jan 3, 2018 11:44 am

Hi Colin‍ 

I'm glad you have done your research and will meet with the Social Worker. As you know being diagnosed with cancer can come as quite a shock and be very frightening especially when you can feel your health declining. 

Have you heard of  Mygutfeeling.ca? They have some resources and information that may be helfpul.

Here is a list of other members who have been diagnosed with stomach cancer if you are interested in connecting.

Good to hear back from you,

Re: New to this

Posted by Colin on Jan 3, 2018 12:14 pm

I'm a little different than most people (apparently) Although the diagnosis was surprising, the only thing that frightens me is lingering in severe pain. I do not fear death. I fear suffering. Although I support people that fight cancer, I firmly believe it is a decision each individual must make. I've seen some success but I've also seen people suffer horribly through treatment, just to die anyway. I think we sometimes concentrate on the quantity of life instead of the quality. I have been in chronic pain for years, had to give up my vocation seven years ago. I have been on LTD ever since and have slowly given up many things I have loved to do. I have no intention of getting any treatment. My goal is to fight for my right to ease my pain and die with dignity on my terms. I will continue that fight until my last breath.

Re: New to this

Posted by Lacey_adminCCS on Jan 3, 2018 12:18 pm

All the best to you Colin‍. I'm sorry to hear about the chronic pain you have been in. It sounds like you have put a lot of thought into your wishes.

Take Care, 

Re: New to this

Posted by Colin on Jan 3, 2018 12:25 pm

I have Lacey. This is not a rash decision. Thank you.

Re: New to this

Posted by Brighty on Jan 3, 2018 2:06 pm

Colin I respect your decision. . Treatment is not fun at all. I watched my fiance go through treatments and surgery and it was a living hell but somehow he made it and for now beat the the odds of stage 4 cancer . You can still beat the cancer there's always hope but it is your decision what you want to do.

Re: New to this

Posted by Wendy7 on Feb 11, 2019 4:32 am

Hi Colin‍ 
checking in on how you are doing and feeling now, 
sending love and support,