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Justin1980
6 Posts
Not sure how this all works. Recently diagnosed with testicular cancer. Had surgery right away to remove(March 16). Now waiting on my follow up appointment April 19 to see if spread and any needed treatment's. I'm feeling all of what I'm sure everyone else feels. Scared, overwhelmed. It all happens in a week and a half. Doctor's visit(mentioned problem), ultrasound,CT scan, removal. All in a week or so. All in all I've got a good outlook on this. I've taken so many great things from this experience but lots of fear and restlessness. Not sure if there's anywhere in specific I should check out on this site? Just figured I'd start with an intro.
13 Replies
Whitelilies
918 Posts

@Justin1980 Hi Justin…..I read your intro….thank you for sharing.

Here is a link….I hope it is helpful for you:

Also…..I would like to introduce you to:

@Trillium

Much appreciation, for our new member…..similar path, as your son…..thank you for your support.

Justin….ALL your emotions are “normal”…..we are/were all scared when heard “those words”……we all wait for tests and treatment plans…..yes it is difficult…..we are here, for one another….to share, to vent, to listen, and more……How are you feeling after your surgery? Strength back? Eating OK? Try a brisk walk, if you can; nature and fresh air are great healers/of our soul.

Regards

Whitelilies

Justin1980
6 Posts

Hi. Thank you for your reply. I've actually been doing really good since surgery. Healed good, moving around and eating fine. Walking everyday a little bit. And generally in good spirits. I find the mental part the hardest. I can keep busy for the most part but like many I'm sure, the nightime comes eventually and the thinking starts. I don't sleep well. Maybe e 3 hours at a time. I look forward to looking into this site a bit and getting some info out of here.

MCoaster
506 Posts

Hi @Justin1980

It is good that you had immediate surgery but it is also very understandable that you feel anxious because you had no time to process between diagnosis and surgery.

@Whitelilies has already given you good ideas and I would like to introduce you to 2 other members who have experience with #Testicular cancer. They are @Iggy331 and @Aaccela who may be able to help. Thank you in anticipation Iggy331 and Aaccela.

As far as insomnia goes many members here can relate, me included. Here are a few strategies that others have found useful, mindfulness, Nidra yoga, listening to on line stories (I like Get Sleepy which you find in Apps or a web search), exercising, music, my doctor suggested melatonin etc. You might also like to post on the Emotional Rollercoaster Forum, perhaps starting a new topic or by joining one of the groups.

I do hope that you find this site as supportive and I did when I was diagnosed with breast cancer (different cancer but a lot of very similar issued around the emotional stuff).

Be gentle on yourself.

MCoaster

Justin1980
6 Posts
Thank you for your reply.
Iggy331
21 Posts
Thanks MCoaster‍ for the mention!

Nice to meet you Justin1980‍, though unfortunate that we meet in a cancer forum.. my journey was VERY similar to yours, fast paced and no time to think. My cancer actually started with breast pain, had a mammogram which didn’t show anything. My family dr phoned me with the results and casually asked if I experienced any problems with my testicles. Checked that night and yup, there it was. I went back to see him a few days later and got sent straight to the surgeon when he confirmed it. Had all my scans and surgery that same night yet. I didn’t even have time to really process what was all happening, and like you, it sure takes a toll mentally. I would encourage you to use this forum, your support people and don’t hesitate to seek some professional help if you feel that you would benefit from it. I’m usually pretty good at responding if I’m tagged in something, so by all means reach out if you need to. Stay strong man, you got this.

Ingmar
Justin1980
6 Posts
Hey. I really appreciate that. Yea it's something else. I'm very fortunate that I have a great family/ friend support system. Everyone's been fantastic and more than I could ask for. I actually had been seeing a counselor with my ex for the last 2 years so it kind of just transitioned into sorting this out with my counselor as my ex and I split up and my diagnosis was pretty close together timeline wise.(ex and I get along pretty good it was a mutual agreement) But yea, wow. I hope you're doing well. I appreciate you reaching out and I look forward to digging around this site a bit.
MCoaster
506 Posts
Hi Justin1980

So glad that you and Iggy have connected.

Just a thought and you may already know this but if you post and want to have that person notified as I did with you or if you want someone to know that you have tagged them as I did with Iggy this is how type @ and, without a space, start to type the name and when it appears in the blue box click it, their name will appear in blue in your post and that person will be notified. If you want to search a type of cancer then type # and the type of cancer will come up in blue, again as I did with you and when the area in blue is clicked on you will find other members who have also posted on that type of cancer. This is how I found Iggy, incidentally whose initial post I had answered a number of years ago.

Best wishes and hope you sleep well.

MCoaster

Iggy331‍ Just checking that you were notified of Justin's post and hope that is okay with you Justin. Hope all is well with you Iggy. Will back out now.
Iggy331
21 Posts
Hey Justin1980‍ no problem! For sure take your time with the site. You’ll find a ton of good information and lots of people willing to help a fellow warrior out.

Having a good support system is awesome, I’m glad you have that available to you. It will make a huge difference. Good on you for bringing that up to your counselor as well, the more resources the better. It’s a tough battle mentally, some people do better at it than others. And there are always good days and bad ones, and that’s okay!

MCoaster‍ i don’t think I did but that could be just me, technology and me don’t always get along haha. I’m doing okay, thanks for asking. Hope you’re doing good as well!
Cynthia Mac
3080 Posts
Justin1980‍ Wrote:
  • I find the mental part the hardest. I can keep busy for the most part but like many I'm sure, the nightime comes eventually and the thinking starts. I don't sleep well. Maybe e 3 hours at a time.
Oh, man, if we (patients and caregivers alike) could overcome the “mental part” a lot of this could be so much easier!

Do you have any strategies for the sleep portion? I think I’ve tried almost everything from meditation to guided meditation (and Yoga Nidra), except for warm milk (bleah!) Those are fine to get you to sleep, but that waking up 3 hours later with a racing mind is awful. At that point, a distraction is usually in order - an audio book, white noise or something of that nature.

Like others, I’m glad to hear that you have a good support network. That can be a real help.


Lacey_Moderator‍ - I just discovered that my reply box on my iPad no longer includes block quotes so I used a bullet...
Cynthia Mac‍ - Thanks for letting me know.
Justin1980
6 Posts
Thank you for the reply. I do what I can to help with sleeping. Not much has been helping. I'm In the process of dealing with the sleep apnea testing(sure I have it). I am hoping that might help. I have great people in my life which I am very grateful for. I find my hardest times are at night or early morning when it seems the rest of the world is sleeping lol as much as I have great support, everyone has their lives happening and I know people can't be there every second of every hour I need them. And I am very much ok and deal with my emotions as needed. I don't try to fight them. I think dealing with emotions is a big part of being ok with everything. I'm just having a hard time figuring this out as it's still very new. I'm sure everyone in this group has felt the same. Plus I'm an over thinker so that doesn't help lol
Brock
55 Posts
Hi Justin1980‍ -

I wouldn't wish the physical discomfort of my cancer treatment on my worst enemy. But it was the mental side effects that are still affecting me.

I won't go into the boring details of my disease or the pain I endured. Suffice it to say that 6 weeks post-treatment I was told we had been successful and I was in remission.

But the mental side effects had only barely begun. It started with deep sadness, which didn't make sense to me because I was in remission. I had every reason to be on top of the world. But the sadness only got worse and I didn't understand why. 6 months later I couldn't bare it anymore so I sought out counselling. I hadn't even known there was a Psychosocial Oncology department at the hospital, that post-cancer depression is a thing. Now, almost 3 years later, I'm still taking anti-depressants (though currently being weaned off them). It's been and continues to be a struggle I never could have imagined.

All this to say, I've learned that negative mental side effects of cancer treatment can be as bad as or worse than the cancer itself. I had no clue until it happened to me. Don't be shy about seeking out help if you think it could help.
Justin1980
6 Posts
Hi Brock. Thanks for your reply.i had my follow up yesterday. I'm very thankful it was staged at T1A. So sounds like they got it which I am so thankful for as I know I had the symptom much longer than I'd like to admit(between 1 and 2 years). They were nervous it had spread. I have a small 8mm lymph node on my stomach. The uro oncologist I saw has now passed my info on to cancer care so it'll be up to them if they send me for chemo or if they monitor it. Supposedly 1cm is when they start chemo? I'm new to all this so that's what I was told.
Sorry to hear about your depression. I'm definately experiencing that myself. I see a therapist I had been seeing with my ex for a couple years so that helps foresure. Right before my diagnosis my ex of 8 years and I had just split up. I had to deal with moving etc. Then hit with this. My ex and I were getting along and she cried saying she wanted to be my support through all of this as I had helped her for years figure out her bipolar as she was doing testing etc. To find out after my surgery she wouldn't be around and she's seeing someone else lol when it rains it pours. I find the not working is driving me crazy. I've always been a worker. Plus the breakup. And covid and everything else it's been alot. I hope your well. Good to hear you're slowly getting off the anti depressants.
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