Kcw Sorry to hear you have breast cancer. I totally get your wish to avoid drugs or treatment. I’d never been ill before my breast cancer diagnosis and wasn’t big on taking drugs...
Your oncologist will be able to tell you the benefits of treatment. They use models to predict the outcome of different treatments and your risk of recurrence based on data from many many cases like yours. Plus they can do an oncotype score that predicts, based on the markers in your tumour, what the benefits of chemotherapy might be... these are predictions of course. They should be able to tell you, with or without.
I did have chemo, and radiation, and in the general scheme of things they were not so bad. I saw much older people than me, struggling to cope with chemo and the side effects. I decided that I would not go through chemo if I was 75...but at age 50 I could take a year out of my life for cancer treatment to get the rest of my life (fingers crossed)...
How are you doing with your healing from your surgery?
Triple Negative Breast Cancer survivor since July 2018
Well, having had a parent who has also undergone treatment for cancer we know can't be cured, there are some difficult things to have to come to terms about.
It's important to support them in their decision. My Dad went right back into chemo and immunotherapy like a trooper, but I noticed soon after the pandemic struck that he was becoming weary of the three-weekly grind. After he passed, friends of his told me that he was tired, and I knew in my heart that he'd been trying to protect me from how tired he was. I also knew in my heart that the day could come when he would want to stop treatment, and while he passed away before that happened, I knew that this would have been his option and that I would have to respect that.
The other suggestion I have is to communicate as openly and fully and meaningfully as possible. Even though Dad and I had a pretty good idea of all the things we wanted each other to know, it was hard when that conversation became "one way only" after he could no longer speak.
This will get you started. Chime back in if there's anything else I can offer.
“When the root is deep, there is no reason to fear the wind.” - Japanese saying
Thank you Cynthia Mac! I appreciate your story, I would say that COVID-19 has been challenging to communicate with our love ones, however, I have been chatting with him by videocall and we are having great time. I will follow your recommendation to hear and talk openly with him.
I wanted to thank all of you for your responses and support!