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My uncle
Brighty
8709 Posts
I know none of you know my uncle but he is losing his 4 year battle with this miserable disease. He fought so hard and my aunt is the saint who never left his side. Please say a prayer for him that it is peaceful.....a prayer for my aunt that she has the strength to carry on. Thank you all.
35 Replies
Whitelilies
2678 Posts

@Brighty
I am sad, that this is the point where they are at….your Uncle….your Aunt…..

Prayers…..Yes……

Warmly

Whitelilies

Brighty
8709 Posts

@Whitelilies thank you. He suffered enough and it's time to let go…just so heartbreaking.

ACH2015
2486 Posts

@Brighty

I'm sorry to hear of your uncle and aunt's situation. Sending peaceful thoughts and prayers to you and your family at this time.

Keep well

ACH2015

Brighty
8709 Posts

@ACH2015 thank you for your kindness.

Runner Girl
3153 Posts

@Brighty
They will both have peace when he passes. Prayers for you all.

Brighty
8709 Posts

@Runner Girl thank you so much. He suffered so much it will be a relief when the suffering is over, but sad at the same time. Like Dan, he had his faults but all in all he was a good person who helped many people. He even helped and was kind to Dan when Dan was sick. He became Dan's family doctor when he had no doctor. Took him on as a patient, no questions asked. Thank you for your message.

@Brighty
I am so sorry to hear this about your uncle. Wishing you and your family peace as you navigate this difficult time.

Lianne

Brighty
8709 Posts

@Lianne_Moderator thank you Lianne!

JustJan
1903 Posts

@Brighty I’m sorry to hear about your uncle. I wish him a peaceful passing and strength for your aunt. You will be a great support to her because you really understand what she is going through.

Sending hugs to you. ❤️

Brighty
8709 Posts

@JustJan thank you so much for your support. My aunt is my hero, she's so strong. It's just amazing. She will not have to go through this alone.

Essjay
2159 Posts

@Brighty so sorry to hear this and thinking of you all ❤️❤️

JenG
257 Posts

@Brighty So hard!! Sending your aunt and uncle and you warm fuzzies and peace. Someone said we are all walking each other home and that makes sense to me. Here’s to a gentle stroll home.
jeng

@Brighty - I'm sorry to hear. You are all in my thoughts.

Take gentle care,

Lacey

Brighty
8709 Posts

@Essjay thank you so much!

Brighty
8709 Posts

@JenG thank you!!!

Brighty
8709 Posts

@Lacey_Moderator thank you so much everyone. Last night I went to say goodbye.. I broke down and couldn't go through with it. I'm going to suck up my tears today and do it. I never got to say goodbye to Dan. All I really want my uncle to know is I love him.

@Brighty

Brave girl. All you have to do is walk in the room and hold his hand. No need to say anything. Just be there. I have a small sense of how hard that is. Somehow I hadn't registered that your uncle was a doctor. That can make it harder but it sounds like he and your aunt are at peace with it all.

Blessings. Sending strength and comfort as you enter this sacred time.

Angus

Brighty
8709 Posts

@WestCoastSailor thank you so much for your kind words.

law1
759 Posts

@Brighty Oh Brighty…..such a sad time for your family. I feel sorry that you have to go thru this hideous monster of a disease yet once more and I wish for peaceful times for you, your uncle and all those whom you love and who love you. 🙏💔

Brighty
8709 Posts

@law1 thank so much. My uncle is still hanging in there, but suffering immensely. Its killing my aunt to watch this unfold. Heaven forgive me for saying this, but I hope he is given some mercy soon for tbe suffering and goes peacefully. This suffering is too much to bear for both of them.

law1
759 Posts

@Brighty …….I agree with you and MAID definitely has its time and place.

It must be agonizing for your aunt and for you to see them both suffering. My cousin had the doc crank up the morphine drip and he faded away……

Poor sad days for you all 😢

CentralAB
1294 Posts

@Brighty I'm sorry you hear about your uncle and all of the challenges you and your aunt are having to face as a result. I have met very few people who are as resilient S you are, and yet there remains, this challenge, trying to say good bye.

I can relate to that particular challenge. I remember well, thinking one time, with my late wife, that I would try to say good ye, and all I could do was to grab hold of her and ball my eyes out, saying “I do t want you to go.”

A little later down the road I recall, similar to how @WestCoastSailor just put it above, and I entered her room, quietly took her hand, waited a few minutes till I could settle myself down, then I just told her “hey sweetie. I'm here, I'm not going anywhere. I want you to know I love you, and I know you are getting so tired of it all, it's OK now if you need to go. I understand now, and I'll be OK. I'll take care of myself and do good things with my life. It's OK for you to go any time.”

And I think you get the idea @Brighty that you can do this, your way, and in your time. The resilient e will come, just when you need it to.

You and your loved ones are in my prayers.

Brighty
8709 Posts

@CentralAB I just did exactly what you told me to do. Held his hand, told him I loved him. It was not a pretty picture let me tell you. What an awful disease cancer is. He probably wont last the night. He was totally unresponsive but I think he knew I was there. Thanks for your support.

Whitelilies
2678 Posts

@Brighty Hi…..So glad you were able to say your goodbyes…..and hold his hand. I know, in my heart and soul, that he knew, you were there.

I believe I was told…..even when unresponsive…..they CAN hear still…..so loving words and music, are heard (and felt in the soul)

Today was hard for you; but you made the memory of sharing your love.

Whitelilies

Brighty
8709 Posts

@Whitelilies thank you. I know he knew I was there I just know. I'm in the car crying now. I was brave there though. I'm just pulling over so I can get my act together and drive home.

Brighty
8709 Posts

@Whitelilies…what did he ever do so bad in his life to deserve an ending like this???? Its so awful.

JustJan
1903 Posts

@Brighty I’m sure your uncle felt your presence and heard your beautiful heartfelt words. I hope you’re feeling us hugging you right now. ❤️

Sadie12
267 Posts

@Brighty Sending you hugs. Sending you and your uncle, aunt and family thoughts of comfort at this time.


CentralAB
1294 Posts

@Brighty:

@Whitelilies…what did he ever do so bad in his life to deserve an ending like this???? Its so awful.

@Brighty I am so sorry that you have had to come to the place where you thought to ask such questions. I know what it feels like. I remember calling a friend at 3 am more than once, and asking him the same kinds of questions about my late wife when she was suffering so. I remember thinking how unfair the whole thing was, she was a social worker, such a kind sweet soul, always helping someone. It was her life purpose, yet she still suffered horrible in the end. I have never fully answered any of those kinds of questions, but one idea did shine thorough. She knew she was loved, and that I was there for her till the end. And I am thinking maybe that could be a part of the light at the end of your tunnel too? You described taking his hand, as I had suggested. Pretty sure he knew you were there. You did something right. You did what was needed. And that is a little light in an other-wise dark place. How are you doing today Brighty ?

Brighty
8709 Posts

@CentralAB I'm so very sorry you had to go through that with your wife. Thanks for asking . I'm ok. Just feel tremendous sadness. How is this world fair that someone who spent their life helping others had to suffer so? A vibrant intellgent caring person reduced to skin and bones. He wanted to live so badly. Did treatment after treatment after treatment clinical trials..everything in the name of living. But instead lost his balance, his ability to swallow food, lost control his bladder, bowels, everything. And what did my aunt do to deserve watching this happen to someone she loved? All my aunt ever did in this life was love people and be kind to people. You can't meet a kinder more sweeter person than my aunt. The most kind hearted person on this planet. It's like, why bother being a good person if this is what you get. I know nothing I'm saying right now is rational. But I can't help feeling this way right now.

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