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Colon cancer terminal symptoms
Nan C
13 Posts
Hi, my mom has stage 5 colon cancer to the liver. It is terminal. She is 91 therefore she was not able to get any treatments. Yesterday and today my mom woke up in the afternoon freezing. Her teeth were clattering. I could not get her to warm up. It took 45 minutes for her to finally feel warm. Why is that happening? What is causing that?
19 Replies
JustJan
615 Posts
Nan C‍, I am not familiar with colon cancer or advanced cancer. Does your mom have a fever? If she does it would be worth calling the triage line or taking her to emerg. If not, I’m thinking a call to her doctor might be in order tomorrow to hear what they have to say.

I’m sure this scary for you and probably your mom too.
Nan C
13 Posts
Thank you. I called télé health and they seem to think it might be a urine infection. Will call her doctor tomorrow. My mom is adamant she does not want to go to the emergency.
Trillium
1227 Posts
Nan C‍ - I’m also sorry to hear about your mom’s cancer and the worrying symptoms she is having. Please keep us updated with what happens tomorrow. We are here for you.

Warm hugs for you and your mom.
Whitelilies
1073 Posts

@Nan C Hello (again)…..I just re-read your intro/profile, I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your father….also from Colon cancer….so sad…..

As a caregiver….please try to carve out a few minutes, each day, just for you…..to re energize…..walk outdoors…..sip cool iced tea….read a mystery novel…..shop online……getting stronger, every day, will be felt, by your mom too…..as you will have more "energy
to support her……

Keep sharing….we are here, for you, and your mom.

Whitelilies

Nan C
13 Posts
Yes good idea. I will try. Thank you.
Trillium
1227 Posts
Hi Nan C‍ - How did it work out for your mom today?
Nan C
13 Posts
Hi,

My mom had no fever yesterday. She is very depressed and very tired. She stays in bed and don’t want to do anything. She don’t want the TV in the room. It’s like she is waiting to die. Did anyone see that in their love ones??
Whitelilies
1073 Posts
Nan C‍ Hello......To be honest....yes....I did "witness" the quick decline of my dad/colon cancer.....for him; it was **not** eating......not a morcel......I cajoled/begged/coerced/pleaded/and more....to no avail.....He did wish to drink. His favourite drink was Club Soda.....so I bought an army-worth......and brought to bed side/hospital.
Your mom is dealing with all her emotions.....be there for her.....sit near her.....with her....ask her if she wishes anything???
Let her lead......
We are here for you.......for her.

Regards
Whitelilies
D1955
53 Posts
Nan C
Hi , sorry to hear about your mom.
Does your mom have a palliative care team and a pain management team?
It is hard to have that conversation regarding end of life and what your mom may want or not want.
If there is a Hospice near you they may have a counselor to help you and you mom out while she still stays home.
I live in Kitchener Ontario and our local Hospice Community offers a wide range of help to caregivers also.
Some times just holding your mom's hand and reading or listening to her favorite music is enough. If she is able to comfortably talk , record some stories of her younger life.
Remember tontake some time each day to recharge. I hope you have support to come in and help.
I was there to help when my dad was dying of cancer in 2008 and when my mom was in her last months of Parkinsons in 2013.
Take each day one at a time.

There are a lot of ears and shoulders here for you.

Dee

Nan C
13 Posts
Thank you. I just don’t know if this stage will last long. I did not ask her yesterday if she wanted some mangoes. I cut some pieces and she took them. She really liked it. I think if I ask it’s always no I don’t want. Thank you for your quick reply. I really appreciate it. I’m very alone in this right now!
Nan C
13 Posts
Hi Dee

i don’t know how to reply to a direct message. It just says reply at the bottom. I would like to reply directly to the person who wrote to me.

in any case, my mom is not yet at the stage for palliative care in Ottawa. Therefore, I try to talk with the case manager at Champlain. She has been kind and gave me some information. We have a nurse that comes every Thursday to clean and change the drainage tube and bag. Now they have started to take her blood pressure and asking more questions. That’s it for the support. My mom is in between to get Assistance in dying. She can die at home if she wishes. But then I would need help.
MCoaster
568 Posts
Nan C
How fortunate your mom is to have you advocating for her.
Joining this site certainly helps me a great deal. Lots of caring and information from others with real life experience. Hope the following will help in making your search a bit easier.

There are two ways to contact another member. One is how I have answered you. Click reply, type @ and with no space start to type the person’s name, when that name appears in the box click it and it will appear in blue in your post. That person will then be notified of your post. To send a private message go to their profile page by clicking on their name (in blue on their post) and you will see the message function. Hope this doesn’t sound too complicated but if it does there is a very useful section at the bottom of each page with a list of resources.

Another really good resource which you might like to contact the Canadian Cancer Society help line 1 888 939 3333. I found them easy and supportive to talk with and they also have lots of information about resources.

With best wishes to you and your mom.

MCoaster
Nan C
13 Posts
MCoaster

thank you so much for the great information! Have an awesome day!
Trillium
1227 Posts
Hello Nan C‍ - it does mot matter where you reply on a thread, your reply will always go to the bottom of the whole thread so tagging like you have now done with our wonderful MCoaster‍ is the way to reply directly to a person.

Hospice services in my area are not only for end of life care but also serve people with life threatening illnesses before end of life care is needed and find that they have better quality of life before end of life care is needed. You need to call and ask about what they can offer you and your mom and the sooner you connect the better.

Here is the Canadian Virtual Hospice which has many resources.
https://www.virtualhospice.ca/en_US/Main+Site+Navigation/Home.aspx

Hugs
Trillium
Kuching
273 Posts
Nan C‍ I hear you about “if I ask, it’s always no, I don’t want”. I went through the same thing with my husband, who had pancreatic cancer. But I found that if I started eating something myself, and then gave him part of it (like half a banana, for instance) he would usually eat it. You have to sneak up on them a bit! I also made it a rule that all pills were swallowed with Boost or Ensure, rather than water. That got 2 or 3 bottles of Boost into him every day, so at least he was getting some vitamins and protein. I wish you the best, you are obviously doing everything you can for your mother.
Nan C
13 Posts
Hi everyone,

First of all thank you all for your kind messages. It brings me comfort and balm on my pain. I’m so very happy to have found this group full of love and understanding. This is so hard. To see your mom withering away day by day. I see her suffer and see her despair its so hard. I just want to cry but I can’t let her see it. She is still strong willed cause she don’t cry. Thank you all again for your messages, it means a lot to me.
Gymrat
16 Posts
Nan C:
Hi everyone,

First of all thank you all for your kind messages. It brings me comfort and balm on my pain. I’m so very happy to have found this group full of love and understanding. This is so hard. To see your mom withering away day by day. I see her suffer and see her despair its so hard. I just want to cry but I can’t let her see it. She is still strong willed cause she don’t cry. Thank you all again for your messages, it means a lot to me.

Big hugs Nan C. It’s almost harder being the caregiver than the patient. I’ve been both in the battle with the beast and dealing with my own disease was easier than watching my wife go through it with ovarian cancer a few months later. I think you’ve proven you’re pretty strong willed, too. Just remember to take care of yourself. You are doing your best and that is all you can do. Use this site for your sounding board as you journey onward.
Wishing peace and strength to you both on this sad journey.
Gymrat

Whitelilies
1073 Posts
Nan C‍ Hello.....please know.....it is OK to cry......I do understand, best not to cry "in front of her"....but step aside/step outdoors/step in the shower....crying is wonderful way to let those emotions out.....you will feel better....feel lighter....perhaps your mom, too, wishes to cry, and will not ,in front of you......have a laugh together! have a cry together! all special bonding moments.
As mentioned earlier....play lovely background music she enjoys....watch TV together.....sip cool water together.....give her a hand massage with scented lotion-lavender....give her a foot massage.....trim her nails....apply soothing lip balm......many ways to connect....and feel the love!
Regards
Whitelilies
Nan C
13 Posts
Whitelilies

Thank you for your response. My mom is deaf therefore no music. But she has lost interest in watching tv, doing her crossword puzzles, knitting, etc. She just lays there wondering when it will be over. I never ever saw her like that. She was always full of life, Loved cooking and baking. Singing!! She is incredibly depressed and everyday I find she eats less, and her coccyx is red and painful. My mom was a huge believer in God and the Virgin Mary, right now she is angry at them and won’t pray. Such a different person we have now. But I have been able to apply hand cream and some cream on her legs. We talk when she is not too tired.
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