Today is my BFF’s birthday. Worst is she died last year in July 27, so I also have that date coming up. She was diagnosed with Undifferentiated Uterine Sarcoma. One of the deadliest forms of uterine cancer. She fought it for about 9 mos then succumbed. I had just started a new job when her condition started to worsen. I was coordinating long distance with her sisters and another friend of hers for care (we lived in different states and she wasn’t married or had a partner). The stress was immense as not only was I coordinating caring for her but they would also talk to me about their feelings and frustrations. We we’re all trying to cope with the situation and it was so difficult. I felt pulled in all different directions. On top of all of this I had a new job and had to take care of my family. I think the worst part of was at the end and I couldn’t be there. I couldn’t take time off of work so all I could do was wait for the news of her passing. To me the whole thing was a disaster and how I wish everything had been different. It’s been a horrible year without her and I just don’t know how to cope with the loss. I just can’t imagine the rest of my life without her. Every day I’m in pain. But I put on the brave face and march on. I wouldn’t wish this on anyone.
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