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Urgent advice please
DadsGirl
2 Posts
I am the only child, next of kin, and have power of attorney.
My Dad just found out he has aggressive bladder cancer with extensive spread. He is in hospital (urology unit for now but transferring to palliative care today as things are happening fast).
He is conscious and coherent.
My mom passed 2 years ago of cancer.

At this point, is there anything that my Dad should do Re finances? (He has a couple of bank accounts, pension, etc). I’m not sure if there is anything that I will “wish I had known” (in terms of moving things from accounts or credit card)… but we were completely unprepared for this and he is fading quickly.

Any advice welcome.
5 Replies
Jackwb
422 Posts

There's nothing that needs to be done today but it's time to prepare for the future. Contact the executor of his will, speak to a trusted financial advisor, line up good lawyer to handle the probate, and speak with his bank manager, life insurance agent, and pension administrator. The most important thing is to get a handle on his financial stuff…where is his money, the status of his house/mortgage and other debts and assets. With some of us it can be very complicated to unravel a lifetime of financial activity.

With the proper advance planning with your team the transition will be short, simple, and seamless.

Wishing you and your dad the best…

supersu
1102 Posts

@DadsGirl

@Jackwb has given you fantastic advice; the only other thing I might suggest is that you connect with the hospital/palliative care unit social worker - they may have some tools to help you and your dad with this financial planning.

hugs
su

#financialplanning #palliativecare #caregiversareANGELSonearth

Lady8i8
9 Posts

Jackwb has given you some great advice.

The only thing I would add is to encourage your Dad to put into writing all of his wishes, whether they be the type of service he wants, or where his belongings should go.

It sounds like a crazy thing but having gone through it with my Dad. The people that came out of the woodwork in his final days, the guys that showed up telling me that he considered them the son he never had, and the seemingly endless string of people wanting to know what I was doing with this or that or claiming Dad wanted them to have it. For the most part, I knew who was BS'ing me. Dad and I talked almost daily even though I'd moved to Ontario (he was in BC). Add to that my father always called my sister and I his “sons” and joked that he always wanted a son and Mom gave him two girls. There's no scenario in which he'd tell some guy - any guy - that they were the son he never had.

One relative, in particular, had a real sense of entitlement and as each of her siblings passed I got to hear the litany of what she figured she should have gotten and how horrible their kids were for not giving it to her. My Dad was in the hospital and we were chatting. I reminded him how awful she had been, and how she was grilling me daily for gossip on his hospital stay. He was pretty clear that there wasn't anything he wanted her to have.

In the darkest of days, the weirdos come out of the woordwork. Do yourself a favour and be sure you are clear on what he wants. You don't need the additional stress and headaches when you're already knee-deep in the myre.

Take care!

Boby1511
1037 Posts

@DadsGirl

Things are moving very quickly for you. Your both in my prayers.

I hope your dad is comfortable.

You can ask the bank, it may be slightly easier to have you added as joint holder on his accounts.

Sending you both best wishes.

Skye2
223 Posts

@DadsGirl

im so sorry you and your Dad are going through this.

im no expert, but I think as long as you know who the executor is, will/law firm, bank accounts, and insurance policies, you can figure out credit cards etc..later.

I hope you get to spend as much time with your Dad as possible.

Big hugs❤️
Sue

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